Lonesome, glad to be of service!
When I was a kid the phrase was something like "That newspaper's only good for wrapping fish"
Recently a friend with whom I shoot a lot commented that "USA Today" was not suitable for reading but most suited for lining parakeet cages.
My thought is that the WSJ op-ed pages are even better since they wouldn't look any different after several days' use.
And I do enter the New Yorker contests but those guys are probably Communists and hate gun owners. That is the only possible reason I never win.