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1 members (SKB),
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Forums10
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Apr 29th, 2024
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Joined: Feb 2005
Posts: 7,438
Sidelock
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OP
Sidelock
Joined: Feb 2005
Posts: 7,438 |
It's time to lighten this forum up a bit!
Laws of the universe
1.Law of Mechanical Repair - After your hands become coated with grease, your nose will begin to itch and you'll have to pee.
2.Law of Gravity - Any tool, nut, bolt, screw, when dropped, will roll to the least accessible place in the universe.
3.Law of Probability - The probability of being watched is directly proportional to the stupidity of your act.
4.Law of Random Numbers - If you dial a wrong number, you never get a busy signal; someone always answers
5.Variation Law - If you change lines (or traffic lanes), the one you were in will always move faster than the one you are in now.
6.Law of the Bath -When the body is fully immersed in water, the telephone will ring.
7.Law of Close Encounters - The probability of meeting someone you know INCREASES dramatically when you are with someone you don't want to be seen with
8.Law of the Result - When you try to prove to someone that a machine won't work, IT WILL!!
9.Law of Biomechanics - The severity of the itch is inversely proportional to the reach
10.Law of the Theater & Hockey Arena - At any event, the people whose seats are furthest from the aisle, always arrive last. They are the ones who will leave their seats several times to go for food, beer, or the toilet and who leave early before the end of the performance or the game is over. The folks in the aisle seats come early, never move once, have long gangly legs or big bellies and stay to the bitter end of the performance. The aisle people also are very surly folk.
11.The Coffee Law - As soon as you sit down to a cup of hot coffee, your boss will ask you to do something which will last until the coffee is cold.
12.Murphy's Law of Lockers - If there are only 2 people in a locker room, they will have adjacent lockers.
13.Law of Physical Surfaces -
The chances of an open-faced jelly sandwich landing face down on a floor are directly correlated to the newness and cost of the carpet or rug.
14.Law of Logical Argument -
Anything is possible IF you don't know what you are talking about
15. Law of Physical Appearance - If the clothes fit, they're ugly.
16.Law of Public Speaking -- A CLOSED MOUTH GATHERS NO FEET!
17.Law of Commercial Marketing Strategy- As soon as you find a product that you really like, they will stop making it OR the store will stop selling it!
18.Doctors' Law - If you don't feel well, make an appointment to go to the doctor, by the time you get there, you'll feel better. But don't make an appointment and you'll stay sick.
The 2nd Amendment IS an unalienable right.
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Joined: Jan 2002
Posts: 601 Likes: 61
Sidelock
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Sidelock
Joined: Jan 2002
Posts: 601 Likes: 61 |
Law of Probability, Corollary 1: The probability of a major screwup increases as the square of the number of observers.
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Joined: Oct 2015
Posts: 593
Sidelock
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Sidelock
Joined: Oct 2015
Posts: 593 |
Law of shotguns. The gun that fits the best is also the sweetest but it is too expensive.
The law of the narrow bridge. As you approach the bridge so does another from the other direction & the timing is perfect.
Part 2 of the narrow bridge law is that the other is a BIG truck.
O.M
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Joined: Jan 2002
Posts: 13,172 Likes: 1158
Sidelock
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Sidelock
Joined: Jan 2002
Posts: 13,172 Likes: 1158 |
Law of Forward Pricing:
If you forward contract to sell a commodity, the futures prices will then go up. If you do not forward contract, the prices will go down. If you ignore the markets, they remain stagnant.
SRH
Last edited by Stan; 11/25/15 07:49 AM.
May God bless America and those who defend her.
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Joined: Apr 2011
Posts: 1,850
Sidelock
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Sidelock
Joined: Apr 2011
Posts: 1,850 |
Variation on #4--If I dial a wrong number it's never a cute blonde that wants a date. 
Practice safe eating. Always use a condiment.
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Joined: Jan 2002
Posts: 9,767 Likes: 757
Sidelock
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Sidelock
Joined: Jan 2002
Posts: 9,767 Likes: 757 |
Murphy's law of inanimate reproduction. If you have a mechanical device of some form or another, and you take it apart and put it together enough times, you will eventually have two of them.
Best,
Ted
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Joined: Jan 2002
Posts: 2,183 Likes: 47
Sidelock
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Sidelock
Joined: Jan 2002
Posts: 2,183 Likes: 47 |
The law of shooter performance in relation to shotgun ownership.
Any high level of shooter performance achieved with a gun not owned by the shooter will never by duplicated once said gun is purchased.
Dodging lions and wasting time.....
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Joined: Dec 2006
Posts: 1,521 Likes: 20
Sidelock
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Sidelock
Joined: Dec 2006
Posts: 1,521 Likes: 20 |
Just a reminder: Murphy was an optimist.
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Joined: Feb 2005
Posts: 7,438
Sidelock
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OP
Sidelock
Joined: Feb 2005
Posts: 7,438 |
law No. 2:
If I were to probe the dark recesses of my work area I'd probably find enough gun springs and screws to constitute a lifetime supply!
The 2nd Amendment IS an unalienable right.
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Joined: Feb 2008
Posts: 11,345 Likes: 391
Sidelock
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Sidelock
Joined: Feb 2008
Posts: 11,345 Likes: 391 |
Law of Grouse Hunting: When you are hunting grouse and carrying your shotgun, they will flush only when you are unprepared, off balance, tangled up in brush, and their flight will be almost supersonic speeds, twisting and turning, and mostly obscured by leaves and trees.
Two weeks later when you are deer hunting and carrying a rifle, they will flush from the middle of a clearing or logging road and gently fly straight away.
A true sign of mental illness is any gun owner who would vote for an Anti-Gunner like Joe Biden.
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